Tears.

Tears represent weakness?
No.

people spill them, when they’re happy.
When they’re ecstatic.

and then all the times of anger.
When they just want to scream and shout;instead they succumb to bawl out loud.

And at the end, they show up in the times when you feel alone.
When you feel worthless.
When you feel lost.
When you feel like a disappointment.
When you feel unloved.
When you can’t take it anymore.

There are always going to be tears.
Like an unwelcomed companion.
But tears aren’t a sign of weakness.
I say, they are a sign of being human.

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Change.

Do you have that moment when you wake up one day, and you realize you’re a whole different person.
It doesn’t happen all of a sudden, it happens gradually. You don’t notice it at all, until that person who you haven’t spoken to , talks to you and you realize how … much you’ve changed. But people treat it as a bad thing.
‘Oh dude, you’ve changed a lot’
How is that an insult? Frankly, when someone said that to me I felt upset. Like I had lost my identity.

And then I realized the only thing constant is change. If you don’t change, something is wrong. human beings evolve everyday, every minute. How is being a different person from two years scary?
Even the earth changes every second.
You change. You grow. You mess up. You’ll learn. That’s life.
And the sooner you realize that, the sooner you let go of that immature self you carry around with you in fear of change.
Embrace the person you become. You’ll have to learn to live with them.

And someday, like I did today,you’ll realize how much you love the person you’ve changed into.

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Everyone had a favorite source of pain,
The one you can’t live without yet it destroys you everyday.
Hers was that boy.
Who melted her when he just looked at her,
Who made her smile just by being there
Who gave a purpose to her heart other than to pump blood,
Who she thanked existed, everyday.

The boy who she stared at her ceiling thinking about every night,
Who’s emotions affected hers unknowingly,
Who made her over think everything he said,
Who’s look she interprets in every possible way;
Who’s existence she loathed,
Because it gave a purpose to her heart other than to pump blood,
To love someone who could possibly never love her back.

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Letters to myself.

Dear 11 year old me,
This is kind of weird since people don’t write letters to 11 year olds. But If harry potter can go to Hogwarts at 11, you can read a letter at 11 😛
So, straight to the point,
Yeah your best friend in the whole wide world is gone. And you don’t feel complete anymore. You don’t wanna have friends, your current class sucks with a lot of weird people in it. 

Puberty won’t be kind to you. Its not gonna make you hot and hence not popular, but that’s good. Because then, you’ll make real friends. You’ll learn a shitload from them. Not all of them will last.
There’s that one girl tho. She’s going to change your life. She’s amazing. Let her know that as often as possible because she doesn’t really believe it rn.
You may seem lost now, but there’s a lot more lonely nights ahead. Don’t worry. Its made up soon. By the perfect people in your life.
Don’t give up hope, ever. You’re going to mess up bad, but you’ll survive. You’ll be happy. So happy one day. I can’t wait for you to find out.
You’ll change. A lot. A LOT.
But that’s okay. Repeat after me, Change is okay. Don’t be ashamed to embrace it. You’ll change into a better person, a happier person. You’ll be satisfied with yourself . Finally.

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Second Chances.

Second chances.
I’m so messed up about these. Like one part of me believes that no one should have second chances. If they fuck up , well, fuck off.
I mean who’d wanna repeat the same mistake twice right? Go through the same things, come out, gaining nothing all over again?
But then the other part argues that,people change.
Everyone changes. not necessarily for the good. But it won’t be the same experience would it?
People learn from their mistakes and if they really ask for a second chance theyre willing to correct their wrong doings?
There is maybe a humane aspect to all this. Give people a chance to redeem themselves. Maybe that’s what the world needs rn. People are shunned off at the first sign of a mistake and this just discourages them to ever do a right thing maybe? At least in some people’s cases.

But the third part of me wonders if I would have everything I have right now if people didn’t believe in second chances.

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